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Suicidal thoughts, nobody cares?

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I m 14, going to be 15 soon. Ever since I was 12 I ve had a constant thought of suicide daily.
I guess I just can t find a reason for living; my parents are in an abusive relationship and fight daily, my grandmother who is the most important person in my life was diagnosed with cancer, and I just got into highschool and don t know anyone. I ve told my doctor about these thoughts, and that ended in my parents yelling at me about how "expensive councilor is" and how their "friends will think they have a crazy daughter". But that s kinda what I expect their reaction to be, they re immigrants and the mere mention of "suicide" is taboo in our culture. I don t know what to do. The thoughts won t stop and I ve started taking pain medication more so I could just sleep off the days. I don t want to be here. I just need a reason to stay.
asked Sep 4, 2016 in Health by smyadmin

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