I am so sorry you are suffering all this grief! Please don't beat yourself up!
I dropped out of the university due to depression just a few weeks shy of earning my PhD. I was already in deep depression and losing motivation fast. The depression partly caused the end of a relationship too and this made things worse. In my field, a PhD was considered essential so it was heartbreaking to me to have to leave to take care of my health. I was ridiculed by quite a few people who couldn't believe I traveled so far in my academic life only to quit weeks short of the "prize." But it was necessary for my survival. And things did not turn out badly as a result.[I am 62 now].
I also experienced an academic crisis after my father suffered a heart attack. Many times I have thought that I was in the last chapter of my life only to find that I was not even half way through it. I hit bottom not a few times on the way, even ending up in a psychiatric hospital for severe depression. Yet I do not consider that my life was ruined by any of this. I feel satisfied with how things have gone and feel I have had and have a good and meaningful life. In a way, I consider my so-called failures as actually blessings in disguise since they opened up possibilities for me and took me to better places than I dreamed of.
Depression is a brutal, brutal illness. You are very heroic and I can only admire you. People you know who have not been stricken by this most terrible of human illnesses will never perhaps understand how strong, how wise, how good and how heroic you really are. Please keep your head held high. There's a whole lot more to you than these misfortunes you have suffered. I wish I knew what to say to comfort or encourage you, but I'm not very good at that. I wish you all good things . . . all the very best.